Rival Loss Alerts · CFB + MLB
Rival Losses.
Ready To Send.
Pick a rivalry, choose your tone, and get an email with roast-ready copy when your rival catches an L.
Speed
<90s
From final whistle to inbox target.
Output
3 options
Clean, funny, and savage copy every time.
Control
Private
We alert you. You decide where it goes.
Same loss · three tones · pick your register
CleanFinal: your rival fell to the Giants, 6–2. Standings updated.
FunnyYour rival lost 6–2. Not ideal for that side of the rivalry.
SavageYour rival lost 6–2. Please respect their privacy at this time.
Setup
Start Tracking
One active rivalry per user in v1. Email is required. Phone can wait.
“Your rival lost 6–2. Not ideal for that side of the rivalry.”
Free beta · one email per loss · unsubscribe anytime · no spam.
When Your Rival Loses, You'll Know
Rivals is a simple product with a specific job. You pick a college football or MLB team you root against. Every time they lose, an email lands in your inbox within minutes of the final whistle — with a short, sharp, ready-to-forward message tuned to the team and the situation. No app to install. No feed to scroll. Just the line you would have wanted to send to the group chat anyway, written for you and waiting.
Three things make this work where a generic score notification doesn't. The message is written, not templated — the tone shifts with the margin, the game flow, and what the loss means for the standings. You pick the register: clean ribbing, a funny aside, or full savage. And the timing is the point. The alert lands while the loss is still raw, when the message hits hardest.
Supported leagues for the 2026 season: college football (20 programs across 10 rivalries) and Major League Baseball (10 teams across 5 rivalries). NHL, NBA, and NFL are on the roadmap. Verified email required — one magic link, no password. Free during beta; paid tier coming.
Scroll up to pick your team, pick your tone, and start tracking.
FAQ
Will I get emailed every time they lose?
Yes. Every. Single. Time. That’s the whole point.
What sports?
College football and MLB for the 2026 season. NHL, NBA, and NFL are on the roadmap.
What’s it cost?
Nothing. Hate is free.
How soon after they lose?
Usually within 10–15 minutes of the final. We watch so you don’t have to.
Can I hate more than one team?
One at a time. Pick a new rival and it takes the old one’s place — hatred, but monogamous.
MLB is a lot of losses — can I turn it down?
No. Hating is a full-time job.
A late game — will I miss it?
If they lose after midnight, you’ll get it when we clock back in the next morning. Bad news keeps.
Why not text me?
Coming. For now it’s email only — with SMS the law only lets you opt yourself in, and we’re not eating an FTC fine to spam anyone.
Will you spam me or sell my email?
No. One email when they lose, nothing else. An unsubscribe link is in every email.
Why did you build this?
Hating is part of fandom. But if you’re sane, you don’t sit there refreshing your rival’s box score. We do it for you.
My rival isn’t listed, or I want a new sport?
Email david@nektarinsights.com and make your case.